How To Easily Spark A Connection on a First Virtual Date

Even if it’s via a dating app with live video, a first date may be exhilarating or nerve-wracking. What you’ll wear (even if it’s just your top, as you won’t have to think about your bottoms that can be hidden in the camera), what you’ll do, and, of course, what you’ll chat about—aside from your occupations. 

These first virtual date conversation starters and tips will help prevent the date from drying up, whether you’re going back there after a divorce or breakup or just interested in meeting new people.

Experts believe that going on a first date with a plan is one of the most effective strategies to reduce nervousness. You don’t need index cards or a script, but having a sound approach to boost the chemistry odds can’t hurt.

Begin By Attempting To Establish A Connection

Even if you and your date already share interests in areas like school or religion, it’s critical to establish rapport on other topics, says Dr. Jess Carbino, a relationship expert and sociologist. Carbino, who has led research for Bumble and Tinder, recommends creating analogies between their experiences and interests and your own.

Clearly State The Obvious

If you’re uncertain how to initiate a discussion, comment on something in your immediate surroundings. Ask them if they’ve ever been to the coffee shop, park, or other location where they proposed to meet or if they spent a lot of time in that area. Based on the cues you pick up first, you may swiftly segue into a broader chat about the city, food, tourism, or another topic.

Inquire About Their Abilities

Ask yourself, “What do you excel at?” What do you do to maintain your progress in… [insert topic here]? Listen for parts of the talk that reveal how much responsibility they take for their lives. Do they consider themselves someone who creates their own life or waits for it to happen to them?

Build On What You’ve Learned

To move the conversation forward, build on what you’ve learned from the original connection point. If you’ve met on one of the best video dating apps, mention anything in their dating profile and ask them a question about it. If a mutual acquaintance introduced you, explain how you each know each other. And so forth.

Learn Their Origins

You may learn a lot about a person by looking at where they grew up or how they raised their children. Make careful to inquire about their origins. This opens the door to discussing shared or different cultures and sharing more personal details about your upbringing. Whether you grew up in different contexts or had the same cultural heritage, discussing it might reveal fresh insights about each other, and you may have more in common than you realize.

Find Information About Their Relatives and Acquaintances

Begin with a simple “Tell me about your family” statement. See what you can find out. Even if the narrative is unpleasant, respond with “Wow, that seems difficult.” How did you handle or overcome that?”

Don’t Inquire About Their Occupation

Dr. Jane Greer, marital and family therapist and author of “What About Me?”, says that a first date is all about demonstrating interest. Stop allowing selfishness to destroy your relationship. Instead of asking, “What do you do?” frame the question as an open-ended question. “How did you decide to get into this line of work?” 

Another way to approach this is to ask, “Is there somebody who has motivated you to follow your job or to persevere in the face of adversity?” If that’s the case, what’s the backstory?’

Getting your date to elaborate on their personality and interests can reveal more about them. In this case, rather than just a job description, you’re searching for more information about their background and line of thought.


Hopefully, the first official virtual date conversation tips and topics will be enough to get anyone started on a successful first date and lead to a second, third, and subsequent dates. Make an effort to stay true to yourself and have a natural, enjoyable discussion with your date using the best video dating apps. 
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